Savage Night

"I was through, wasted up. I wasn't living; I was just going through the motions.
 
Life is remembering, I guess. If you've lost interest, if everything is that same shade of grey, the kind you see when you look into light with your eyes closed, if nothing seems worth storing away, either as bad or good, reward or retribution, then you may keep going for a while. And you don't remember.
 
[...]
 
I snapped out of it then, and came back to life. You have to at a time like that whether you want or not." 
 
Jim Thompson: Savage Night