Wednesday, May 26, 2004

SisypHus

In the Greek mythology Sisyphus was forced to roll a block of stone against a steep hill, which tumbled back down when he reached the top. Then the whole process started again, lasting all eternity. My work with pHinnWeb often feels like that, especially now.

Transferring all this material to phinnweb.org, correcting links on HTML documents, checking all of them individually to see that all images linked are working OK, and downloading them from the old site in case they are not (it seems the TAR package
pHinnWeb was transferred in cut off some -- I don't even dare to think how many -- HTML documents and images) -- it feels like a hellish workload. I have made myself a goal that this job should be undertaken during this summer, and working just a couple of hours a day: out of necessity because I have to use public access computers of library and Vuoltsu's Net Café, and because I don't want to burn myself out with this job. I'm already feeling some symptoms of that and being stressed enough. Anyway, I always seem to get depressed at this exact time of year, feeling so alone. When there should be summer in the air, and love, and all that crap, but the weather just remains in the side of low pressure; the sky is cold, gray and monochrome bleak, like oppressive hard steel, and there are no friends around, just no one who would care. And you dwell in your lonely existence, and try not to get crushed underneath it all. -- I guess I'm going slightly mad at the moment, but still have to act like a sane person. I just have to keep together now, stay strong.

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